Anyway, the first chapter, revised, is here:
Chapter 1: Lucky Catch
with some questions and concerns I'd love to hear readers' opinions on.
Please do comment and let me know if you're interested in reading any more. I'm planning on posting a chapter a week in my main journal, friends-protected. We'd discussed keeping this community alive to discuss our stuff after NaNo, so let me know if you're interested in that; I can crosspost. :)